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10 Ways To Celebrate Singles Awareness Day 2015

10 Ways To Celebrate Singles Awareness Day 2015
100 Dates In 100 Days-A Man’s Guide To Sweeping a Woman Off Her Feet
4 Do’s and Dont’s of Single Parent Dating
4 Unexpected Pleasures of Being Gay and Single on Valentine’s Day
The Ultimate Valentine’s Day Gift Guide 2015
The Complete Guide To Being An Irresistible Woman: 6 Techniques That Will Keep Him Wanting More
15 Essential Dating Rules Every Girl Should Stick to in 2015
5 Child Friendly Valentine’s Day Date Ideas
Fifty Shades of Grey: Fantasy or Fallacy?
What Should You Do If Your Partner Cheats?
Valentine’s Day Survival Guide For a Single Girl
13 Signs That You’ve Found “The One”

Posted: 12 Feb 2015 04:00 PM PST

Love hearts, balloons, poems and PDAs; singletons – are you fed up of Valentine’s Day already?

If cupid’s arrow hasn’t struck this year and you’re miserable about being single, fear not! Here’s something to cheer you up. National Singles Awareness Day is a fun alternative to Valentine’s Day where single people unite and remind each other that they don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy! Some celebrate it on Valentine’s Day itself (14th February), while many wait to celebrate it on 15^th February when the love-overload has calmed down.

If you’re looking for ideas on how to embrace single life and enjoy this light-hearted day; here are 10 top suggestions:

1) Single friends ‘Secret Valentine’ 
A super fun alternative to Secret Santa! Arrange for a group of single friends to do a humorous Secret Valentine gift exchange. Spend £10 each and look for the wackiest gifts you can find. A plus point to this is that if you opt for ‘love themed’ presents – at least all the chocolates will be half price if you’re celebrating the day after Valentine’s Day! So scoff the lot and enjoy!

2) Plan a singles get together at home 
Rather than just your core bunch of single pals (who are probably in the ‘friendzone’), put the feelers out and ask people you know if they have any eligible single friends who could be good to meet. Plan a singles party at your house and use it as an opportunity for some matchmaking! Your coupled-up friends will probably rejoice at the opportunity to suggest potential suitors to attend the celebrations. You could even set up a Facebook event and ask friends to invite a couple of single friends each. It’ll be a great story to tell people if you do end up finding a hot new date.

3) A marathon session on WeLoveDates
The old saying goes: ‘there are plenty more fish in the sea’, but how do you know if you’ve not dipped your toe in the ocean? Why don’t you have a browse of WeLoveDates and see who’s out there! The man/woman of your dreams might be right in front of you – you just have to find them! So have patience, start looking and as an extra incentive – here’s a special discount code. Get 50% off your first month on WeLoveDates with code “SINGLESDAY”.

4) Go to a Singles Night 
This time of year is prime time for singles events. From speed dating, to wine tasting nights to traffic light parties and even ‘silent speed dating’ (where you sit opposite someone but you can’t talk to them – it’s all about the subconscious connection!) In America, a popular Anti-Valentine’s event at bars is ‘Shred Your Ex’, where you take a photo of your ex to be put through a shredder and receive a free drink! What better way to get over someone than to drink and shred!

5) Spend time with that special BFF of the opposite sex
Almost every girl has at least one guy who is her best friend. Yes he may be in the friendzone, but he’s always at the other end of the phone when you’ve got a problem and he’ll always be your plus one. Singles Awareness Day is a day you should go out and celebrate, and thank these kind of special friends in your life for being there.

6) Retail therapy
If you don’t feel like going out – why not treat yourself to a special gift you’ve been wanting for a while? A new book? A DVD? Some jewellery? Let’s face it – if you were in a relationship, you’d be spending money on your other half, so treat yourself instead!

7) Movie night with friends 
This isn’t saying watch back-to-back Ryan Gosling movies and sob over The Notebook.  Instead, get your single friends round and swoon over your ultimate Hollywood crush. Think Channing Tatum in Magic Mike, a bottle of wine, chocolates and pizza. 1, 2, 3…”mmm”.

8) Single mood-boosting solutions – have some ‘you time’ 
Rather than going out drinking, dancing or planning a big event – sometimes the ultimate mood booster is a pen, paper and some nice music. Sit down and have some well-deserved ‘you time’ to reflect. Write down all the pros of being single – for example, you’ve got the freedom to go where you want, you don’t have to deal with nightmare in-laws or your partner’s bad habits and you’re in charge of the television remote control (!) Also, while making your list, create a playlist of your favourite tracks- you’ll be amazed at how much music can make you feel better.

9) Pampering day
Let’s face it – we all feel more confident when we’ve pampered ourselves. From getting our hair done, to having a massage, a manicure or even a spa day. Why not schedule some time off on Singles Awareness Day to go to a posh spa for the ultimate indulgence package?

10) Go abroad for an alternative type of celebration 
If you want Valentine’s Day to be less ‘in your face’, why not plan a holiday during this week to somewhere where there’s a different celebration going on. Prime example – Brazil! Go celebrate The Carnival of Brazil where there’s dancing, extravagant costumes, samba, singing, dancing and fun festivities!  There are so many great events around the world at this time of year – if you’re looking for something bizarre, how about the ‘Naked Festival’ in Saidai-ji, Japan? Men in loin-cloths battle at a temple to win possession of the two sacred shingi (wooden sticks) while having freezing water poured over them! There’s also Mardi Gras in New Orleans in February! Who knows, you may find love with Mr/Miss Snake Hips while you’re dancing in the moonlight!

So you’ve survived Valentine’s Day (or to quote Jay Leno ‘Extortion Day’ – where chocolates and flowers are suddenly overpriced) and you’ve managed to embrace Singles’ Awareness Day (or Half Price Chocolate Day as some may call it).

Remember – being single really isn’t that bad. You’ve got the mystery of meeting the man/woman of your dreams to look forward to. Who knows where they are hiding? Don’t forget the old saying: ‘everyone has a knight in shining armour, but mine got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions!’

Check out these 20 surprising worries that single people have.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all the happy couples out there, too…we didn’t forget about you!

10 Ways To Celebrate Singles Awareness Day 2015 is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

100 Dates In 100 Days-A Man’s Guide To Sweeping a Woman Off Her Feet

Posted: 11 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

100 dates in 100 days…no problem, right? On the face of it, dating 100 women in 100 days sounds like either the ultimate after work past time, or something that might give you diabetes and a strong desire to join the Catholic priesthood. But there is a reason as to why we're discussing this. I hate to bring figures into the equation (do you like what I did there?), but dating is a numbers game at the end of the day. The more people you meet, the more likely you are to meet the woman of your dreams. So how do you do it? And more importantly how do you do it in a way that sweeps your date off her feet?

The Dreaded Numbers
Online dating has become the 21st Century method of finding Mrs. Right. As of the 7th July 2014 there were 54,240,000 single people in the US alone and 41,250,000 had tried online dating. Like pizza, you can order a date every night and have her delivered to a location of your choosing. That might sound a bit sexist but many women do tend to be attracted to a man who likes to lead. Besides if the lady in question doesn't like your suggestion, she will say so. But most people don't order a date every single night of the week. Why? To many singles, the idea sounds exhausting and anti-social. 'What about my friends and family?' I hear you ask. 'When am I going to have time to see them?' Well if your friends really are your friends, they will always be there for you. The same is often true for your family. If you keep finding excuses not to date, and then moan that you can never meet anyone, you only have yourself to blame. You have to make the time. There's a reason there were still 54,240,000 single people in the US last year: lack of effort.

So how do you go about dating as many people as possible?

How to date 100 women in 100 days

The Guide
What is it the modern woman looks for in a partner? More to the point, what is a modern woman?! Is there any such thing? This is going to be a learning experience first and foremost. The more women you meet, the more you are going to be able to tell what traits and characteristics you like and what you don't like. Your usual 'type' might not be your 'perfect type'. The first thing you have to do is to keep an open mind. So below are a few things to bear in mind with every woman you date. This is a rough guide designed to help you learn how to find the woman that's right for you. I don't like saying 'woman of your dreams' because the reality is often far more attractive and interesting.

1. Make time for her
If you think that you can be clever and organise several dates on the same night, think again buddy. You need to give her and more importantly, yourself the time to get to know each other. This isn't a sprint. It's a social occasion. She'll respect and like you more if you put in the proper amount of effort in trying to get know her.

2. Be realistic with your selections
Setting the bar high is great! However, if you think that going out with a tall leggy blonde with big breasts and a nice arse is the ultimate solution than you're an idiot. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with a tall leggy blonde with big breasts and a nice arse (far from it), but you need to look beyond the breasts. You're going to have a much better time by going for personality over physicality. Try looking at someone's interests, likes and dislikes a little more before arranging a date. That way you're more likely to end up dating women you like and not just drool over.

3. Be a gentleman
Ignore what any ultra right wing feminist says (they're the wrong type of feminists anyway), women still like a man to be a gentleman when out on a date. I've had several experiences where I thought that if I spent the evening ignoring my date and talking to other people, my date would be more attracted to me. Imagine my surprise when I turned round to ask her if she wanted another drink, and all I saw was an empty seat. Show your date the respect she deserves and be a gentleman.

4. Remember your sense of humour
Women love a guy who can make them laugh. Your six pack and toned biceps are worth 1% whereas an evening of fun and laughter are worth 99% to a lady. I'm not saying you should go with jokes prepared – women can see that a mile off and it's not funny. All I'm saying is learn to laugh at things and, most importantly, at yourself. If you can't see the humour in life, then you are not going to enjoy your dates. Remember dating is supposed to be fun! Why would you not want to laugh?!

5. Be patient and understanding
Would it surprise you to know that the lady sitting across the table from you is just as nervous as you are? Women get shy as well. Don't write someone off just because they're quiet at first. Be patient, be polite and let your lady know that she has nothing to worry about.

6. Be resilient
If you are to have any hope of enjoying your dating then you need to develop a thick skin. Building up resilience to things like rejection, weirdness, and insanity is essential. You're going to meet women you like but who don't like you. You're going to meet women who like you but you don't like them. This is normal! Be resilient because your next date could be the ultimate click.

7. Show interest
Dating takes commitment and energy. If you're tired, have a bad diet and/or are drinking heavily then your energy reserves are going to be low. You're not going to be interesting or interested. Your date will see this and form a negative opinion of you. Show some interest. Look after yourself and your date will be impressed with your energy.

8. Don't forget who you are
Otherwise known as 'Be Yourself'. Women hate men who lie. If you haven't visited deepest darkest Peru, don't say you have just to impress your date. You'll look like an imbecile when it's discovered the furthest you've been is your local train station. Trust your own personality to shine through. It will help you learn whether or not you're a proper match with each other. WOMEN HATE MEN WHO LIE!

9. If you're shy, let your lady know
If you're naturally shy don't panic. You can make a joke out of it before meeting up. Respect your date and trust your own personality. If she wants to meet you she will; shyness or no. After a few dates, you'll find that Mr. Confidence starts shining through naturally.

10. Don't lie to your date
The top things women lie about on their profile are Age, Appearance and Weight. The top things men lie about on their profile are Age, Height and Income. Here's an important tip: DON'T LIE! WOMEN HATE MEN WHO LIE! You will always get caught.

Now that you're prepped, it's time to start the challenge. Time to discover if you're the man you want to be. Can you find the right click?

100 Dates In 100 Days-A Man's Guide To Sweeping a Woman Off Her Feet is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

4 Do’s and Dont’s of Single Parent Dating

Posted: 10 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

Dating is often a scary word to single parents. Often the last relationship has gone sour (which is what happened in my case) and unlike a regular break up you always have that reminder of you ex in your child. In the beginning it was so hard for me because my four month old daughter looked so much like her father. Thankfully as months and years passed she now looks and acts exactly like a mini version of me. This was one of the many reasons why I didn't feel like I could date for a long time, having my daughter as a constant reminder of the pain I'd endured at the hand of my ex put me off wanting to try again. But of course it gave me some time to really think about what I wanted in a relationship and a partner, and I definitely think going into it this time I'm a lot wiser!

It's human nature to make mistakes, but when you're dating as a single parent these mistakes don't just come at cost for you, but they can be detrimental to your child, especially a very young and impressionable child. There are of course way to avoid hurt for both of you, signs to look out for in trying to find a partner who is good for you and your child.

These are my 4 top do’s and dont’s for single parents who are dating again:

1.My golden rule is don't introduce your child too early.

Children form attachments so much faster than adults, again this applies more so to younger children. Introducing your child to a potential partner (and of course, referring to them as that) before you're even sure if it will work is bound to end in disaster. If this is the first person you're dating since the breakdown of your relationship with your child's mother or father, it's possible that this is still your rebound. Rebounds don't always happen days or weeks after a break up, they often happen months or even years so just be careful. Start by introducing them as a friend if you want them involved in family activities and once you are both sure it's going to work out, then slowly allow your child to accept that this person is here to stay.

2. Have a good long think about the sort of person you feel would be good for you and your child.

Taking myself as an example.. I have a history of dating guys who would be no good as a father figure. They either behave as a child themselves or they're only interested in a trophy. You need someone who will lighten the load, will be happy to be hands on (not straight away of course) and of course in the long run, love your child as part of their family. My best friend and sister have got incredibly lucky from here, and the guys they are now dating since being single mothers are completely different to the sort of person they have dated in the past. They definitely give me hope that I can change in the kind of men I'm attracted to!

3. After a while do do do include them as part of the family.

There is nothing worse than keeping your family life with your children and your partner as two separate parts of your life. If you ultimately want your relationship to work out you have to be able to merge to two seamlessly. I know this makes me sound like a bit of a hypocrite because I have mentioned further up the article about not introducing a potential partner too soon, so this of course is the next step once the relationship is established. I have known single parents who have their children during the week but once the kids are away at their mothers/fathers they spend time with their new partner. This does not work. You can't live two lives. When you find the right person it will be so easy for them to fit into your daily life. Then of course if you reach the stage of living together it won't be a shock to your child when they suddenly appear in their house every morning or night.

4. Ultimately, your new partner has to be aware of your situation from the word go.

It has to be something you bring up in conversation if things do get serious. Dating someone who isn't prepared of discussion a future with you once you attach the label of boyfriend or girlfriend probably isn't right for you or your children. When you have a child you are always considering the future and this person needs to be comfortable to also do this with you. There are really no rules to dating any time of your life, but when a child is involved, you do have to be more considerate and careful. It's one thing to cause yourself upset, but you must be more wary with your actions when you have a child, in every aspect of your life. That's why I will never bungee jump!

4 Do’s and Dont’s of Single Parent Dating is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

4 Unexpected Pleasures of Being Gay and Single on Valentine’s Day

Posted: 09 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

Is it really so bad to be a single gay man on Valentine's Day? Well… no, it's really not, but since society attempts to ram the idea of love and coupledom down our throats around this day, it's enough to make you want to vomit… and let's face it – most gay men have an excellent gag reflex. There are a few different ways that a gay single man might approach Valentine's Day. You might not buy into it at all, and it can be just another day (where it might be difficult to get a restaurant booking). It can also be a day where you are painfully reminded of the fact that you're single, and the fear beings to set in – you can wonder if it will always be this way. It won't, obviously, but it's perfectly reasonable to feel a bit unsettled around this time of year if you don't have a special someone. If you want to celebrate Valentine's Day but find yourself without a man in your life, not to worry. We've got a few tremendous ways to turn Valentine's Day into a gay man's party for one…

1. A Date for One

Enjoying your own company is a vital skill for adults, one that many people seem unable to master. So why not take yourself out on a date? Treat yourself to dinner at a nice restaurant. Maybe you won't have company, but who cares? Appreciate the food, and you can bring a book if you want to have some intellectual stimulation. You might worry that people will watch you, and judge you, but they're unlikely to. Even if they do – screw it! The only thing they probably read for pleasure are the two sentence descriptions of internet porn videos. Make a night of it – go and see a movie as well. If you're not used to doing this alone, you might find it to be a truly pleasurable experience, one that allows you to truly concentrate on the film. After a fun solo evening, take yourself home and take advantage of yourself with a delightfully prolonged masturbation session. Be sure to use fancy lotion… because you're worth it!

2. A "Boyfriend" for the Night

It can be a little silly to actually try and find a boyfriend for Valentine's Day, but you might be able to find a reasonable simulation of one. Go out partying, and go alone. Flying solo might make you more willing to talk to people, and not being surrounded by a group of friends will make other guys more willing to speak to you. Take your sweet time getting ready, and make yourself pretty. Wear that new shirt that squashes your burgeoning man boobs into pecs and hit the club. Drink, dance, and don't give a damn about the fact that you're alone. You might meet someone for the night, and who knows – a drunken one night stand might be the start of something beautiful. Just don't get so drunk that you wake up next to the broad hairy back of a stranger, covered in claw marks.

3. The VIP Club (AKA Drinking Alone)

Perhaps you don't feel comfortable in leaving the house on Valentine's Day and having a solo night out, since this really does emphasize your single status. Without being depressive, it's perfectly OK to have a night in and shut yourself away from the world. Order food (a lot of food) and turn your phone off. Binge watch crap TV – as much as you want. Just one more episode? Screw that… what about another 5 episodes? This night is for you. Maybe don't spend the whole night watching TV, since there's no reason why you can't party despite the fact that you're alone. This is not something we suggest you do on a regular basis, but trust us – drinking doesn't have to be a social activity. Drink a bottle (or five) of your favourite drunkenness-inducing beverage and listen to crappy pop songs. Dance your ass off in the privacy of your own living room… If you turn the lights down and squint your eyes, it's like being at a VIP club.

4. Die, Valentine's Day, Die!

If you truly, truly hate Valentine's Day and don't want other gay men to enjoy it either, then you have the option of being a total sociopath about it. You could justify your behaviour by saying it's a denouncement of the garish societal expectations regarding the discourse for expression of affection, but really, you're just being a bitch. Go to your local gay bar and look for an annoyingly cute couple. Wait by the bar, and then when one of them comes to buy drinks, engage him in conversation. Just ask him for the time, or pretend to think he's the friend of the friend. Wait for him to reply, and then (loud enough for his date to hear), shout "No, I won't have sex with you in the bathroom!" and then storm out. Next, go to another gay bar and look for another annoyingly cute couple. Go up to their table and say to one of them, "Sorry to intrude – but I just wanted to say I recognise you from your online videos and they're really, really hot." Smile and leave before he has a chance to dispute your statement. OK, so maybe you won't do any of these things, but it can be fun to imagine.

There's no need to fret if you're single on Valentine's Day, and you can have a perfectly good time all by your awesome self. Sometimes the gay clichés can be a little annoying, but Valentine's Day is the one day of the year where single gay men need to look in the mirror and acknowledge their own fabulousness. Whether you snap your fingers and say, "Mmmm yeah girlfriend" is entirely at your discretion.

4 Unexpected Pleasures of Being Gay and Single on Valentine’s Day is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

The Ultimate Valentine’s Day Gift Guide 2015

Posted: 09 Feb 2015 09:33 AM PST

Love is in the air and it’s time to celebrate the ultimate festival of affection – Valentine’s Day!

If you’re stuck for gift ideas, WeLoveDates is here to give you some inspiration. Whether you’re buying for a partner, a best friend or even treating yourself- here are some fun and original suggestions:

Gifts for a Boyfriend/Husband

Beard Grooming Kit – For stylish guys who rock the manly look
If your man is of the bearded variety – why not get him a Bearded Bear gift set? The perfect way to tame the beast! It includes oil, wax, balm and scissors so your grizzly bear can keep himself perfectly trimmed.

Valentines Edition Single Malt Region Whisky Set – For a guy who loves a tipple
This is the ideal gift for a whisky lover from Whisky Tasting Company. A selection of 5 bottles of single malt whisky from different regions of Scotland. There are even tasting cards that come with the set, so you can see the landscapes where they’re produced and read about what makes each bottle distinctive. You don’t need to be a Scotsman to appreciate this box of Highland nectar!

whiskey_set

Heated back and seat massager – The perfect ‘boy toy’ to help him de-stress
Does your man moan about aches and pains? Perhaps he’s just fond of a massage? Why not surprise him with a heated back and seat massager? You can choose between your favourite massage modes – such as tapping, rolling and kneading. It can also be used in the car, in the office or at home so the perfect transportable pamper option.

iPhone Docking Station and Organiser – for the man who has everything
If your man is difficult to buy for – this may just be your answer. A handmade Baltic birch wooden stand by PalmettoFurniture on Etsy where you can store your wallet, watch, keys and it’s even a phone docking station and charger too. Talk about multi-tasking!

Lincolnshire Produce Family Hamper – Delicious treats that everyone can share
Why not buy your partner a gift you can share? This unique Lincolnshire hamper by Abbey Parks comes in a bespoke wooden box and includes clotted cream toffee, shortbread, crisps, plumbread, jams, beer, chutney and more.

‘I Pick You’ Guitar Plectrum – A romantic touch for a guitar lover
Guys may not like the soppy gifts as much as girls, but if you want to show your affection to your guitar-playing hunk, you could opt for this handmade ‘I Pick You’ golden plectrum by giftforbestfriends on Etsy.

Polaroid Z2300 Instant Digital Camera – For techie guys who love a touch of retro
Ever miss holding a real photograph rather than seeing it on your phone/computer? Well, here’s your solution – the super cool Polaroid instant will print a 2″x 3″ photo in under a minute. Capture your special moments instantly and why not keep them to stick in a relationship memory book?

The Mystery Box – It could be anything!
Firebox.com have a great gift idea for those who can’t think of a suitable gift for their partner (or perhaps they’d rather leave it to fate!) The ‘Mystery Box’ option is £29.99 and the only information you get is that it’s ‘expertly picked’ and ‘guaranteed to prolong your relationship for another year’. Even you’ll be excited when your other half unwraps this mystery gift!

Gifts for a Girlfriend/Wife

Reasons I Love You Book – For the soppy romantics (it’ll earn you brownie points)
Nothing beats a message straight from the heart and this wooden journal is your perfect opportunity to show the lady in your life how much you care. You can fill it with photos, memories or even write down your favourite things about her and you can also have both your initials on the front. It’s handmade by KatDeco on Etsy and it will be something you can look back on in years to come.

Spooning Pillow Case Set of 2 – For your favourite spooning partner
We’ve fallen in love with these spooning pillow cases by OldEnglishCo on Etsy. Never has there been an easier way to reserve your side of the bed and they’re super stylish too. Your spooning buddy will be thrilled with your originality and attention to detail. What a great idea!

Chocolate Tree – Heaven for a woman with a sweet tooth
If your girlfriend has a favourite type of chocolate – instead of just getting her one, why not get her a tree? She’ll always remember the effort you went to. Sweet Trees sell Personalised Creme Egg trees, love hearts, marshmallows and more!

Personalised Penguin Cushion – Customised and cute
This one will definitely get the ‘aww’ reaction. Tillyanna customises penguin cushions with couples initials on Notonthehighstreet.com. An adorable idea that will make your girlfriend chuffed you showed your soppy side.

Mini Book Love Locket Necklace – A memento she’ll treasure
This gorgeous mini love locket by Regalrose is a lovely gesture if you want to to buy something that’s personalised and won’t break the bank. You can choose which initial to put on the front and then there’s space to insert your own photos or perhaps a little love note inside.

Personalised Map Print – Ideal for long distance lovers
This is such a lovely idea from PaperArcadia on Etsy. It’s especially good for couples who have had long distance relationships or were born in different cities. Pick two locations and a customised picture will be created for you with two sides of a map uniting in a heart. You can have your names and a special date at the bottom too.

Brass Secret Message Custom Bangle – Stylish with a romantic surprise
If your lady loves bangles- this idea is sure to please! GramercyEight on Etsy creates gorgeous bangles with a personalised message stamped inside. Why not get your names, an important date or a special message of love?

The Red Wine Love Hamper – When you want the full selection
If you want to buy your lover something that ticks all the boxes – this is the gift for you. Peachhampers.co.uk have a variety of special Valentine’s hampers and this luxurious option includes a teddy bear, strawberry preserve, champagne and a mix of chocolates. You can even have your photograph on the front of the hamper box.

Gifts for yourself (girl)

Whether you’re single or in a relationship – why not use Valentines Day as an excuse to spoil yourself?

Raw Choc Pie Gift Pack – Ideal for a healthy chocolate fix
If you’re a chocolate lover, but want something that’s guilt free then here’s an idea for you – a Raw Choc Pie Gift Pack from The Raw Chocolate Pie Company. The chocolate is handmade in West Cornwall and it’s sugar free, dairy free and gluten free. Sound too good to be true? Well it’s also a superfood and tastes delicious! It’s made from raw cacao, agave nectar and coconut butter. In this gift pack, you’ll get a naked pie, a Goji berry pie and a Himalayan Salt pie. Don’t forget to keep them in the fridge!

Foot Pampering Kit – Relax, unwind and spoil yourself
Let’s face it – if a guy buys you a foot pampering kit, you might assume he’s hinting at something. Us ladies buy shoes because they’re beautiful, not because they’re comfortable and our feet can take a battering. Margaret Dabbs Discovery Kit for feet is a staple that every girl needs. You can use it during a pamper session, take it to the gym or even take the kit on holiday. It includes hydrating foot lotion, hydrating foot soak, foot oil and foot mousse. The ideal way heal the skin, pamper yourself and keep your feet looking beautiful.

Hedgehog Onesie – When you’d rather dress like Bridget Jones than Beyonce
If being sexy on Valentine’s Day is the last thing on your mind – why not treat yourself to something super cosy like this Hedgehog Onesie? It’s not the sort of gift your boyfriend would get you but who needs sexy lingerie when you can opt for something as comfortable as this? This fleecy spectacular is the ideal option for a night of ice cream and chick flicks, especially on a cold February night.

Gifts for yourself (guy)

Boys – you may not be fussed about Valentine’s Day as much as women are, but if you’re also in the mood to treat yourself, then these options will definitely put a smile on your face!

The ‘Pop Up Pub’ Beer Hamper – ideal for a night in with the boys
Pork cracking, quiz games, beer mats and a selection of special ales. You’ve seen ladies pamper themselves with mudmasks and chocolates, but why not have a night with the boys and recreate a visit to the local. Whisk Hampers have got you covered with this excellent boys-only solution.

Smart Glove Touch Gloves for SmartPhone – text on the go and avoid the chill
Fed up of cold hands and trying to text someone? These Smart Gloves are the ultimate solution to your freezing paws! They’re both stylish and convenient and will keep your fingers nice and toasty when you’re on the move.

Beard Ski (Vi)king Of The Slopes Mask – warm funny and practical for snow sports
Don’t mind looking ridiculous as long as you stay warm? Forget Valentine’s Day and focus on the next ski trip! If you want to be a legend amongst your mates – this fake beard ski mask is the novelty face accessory that they will never forget. Alternatively, if you’re avoiding your girlfriend and you need a good disguise – bingo!

Gift from a girl to her best guy friend

‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’ Book – To make women seem a little less complicated
A dating classic! Help your best guy mate understand women better. He’s probably too embarassed to buy this book himself but it might explain a few things…

Superman Socks – a treat for that platonic friend who’s a superhero in your life
Is your male best friend your very own superhero who’s always there to listen to your guy dilemmas and problems? Why not make him laugh with these caped Superman socks?

Gift from a girl to her best girl friend

Infinity Friendship Bracelet – to show how much the friendship means to you
Who needs men? Show your BFF some love with this personalised infinity bracelet. The timeless symbol of infinity will be an indicator that your friendship can last a lifetime. Etsy seller DITskyjewellery makes these gorgeous silver plated infinity bracelets on coloured cotton cord. Simple and beautiful.

Personalised Wine Glasses – ideal for after rough day at work or to celebrate the weekend
Make your best friend giggle with some comedy personalised wine glasses. Made by Becky Broome in a Cheshire studio and sold on Notonthehighstreet.com, sometimes all you need after a long day is a BIG glass of wine.

original_personalised-wine-glass

Whether you’re single or attached – with all these tempting gift ideas, it looks like Valentine’s Day could be the perfect excuse for some retail therapy!

The Ultimate Valentine’s Day Gift Guide 2015 is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

The Complete Guide To Being An Irresistible Woman: 6 Techniques That Will Keep Him Wanting More

Posted: 08 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

Every girl wants to be the one who makes men go crazy. But you don't have to be the most beautiful woman in the room or have any kind of natural talent or je ne sais quoi to be the irresistible girl. Being irresistible is simply a matter of a mastering a few techniques that leave men wanting more.

Disclaimer: There are schools of thought who might say that some of these techniques are manipulative or dishonest. The fact is that being irresistible means not being an open book. If that makes me dishonest, then so be it. Laying all your cards on the table immediately is a surefire way to be… well, resistible.

That said, let's get to it! Follow these techniques and you'll have men telling their friends that there's just something about you.

Don't Be So Goddamn Present

This is one of the biggest mistakes I see women make when they are dating a man, especially in the early stages. As my mother says, he can't miss you if you're always around. It can be difficult if you really want to be around this guy, and it's even harder if you have the feeling that he really wants to be around you as well. I'm sure he does. Still. Resist the urge. A big part of the dating dynamic is the longing for someone: remembering their smell, recalling an intimate moment, or thinking about what qualities about them you like.

But there is yet another reason why you should be absent every once in awhile. Feeling that someone needs you, especially early in a relationship, is a turn off, especially for men. Therefore here are a few ways you can be less present with your guy, and drive him crazy (in a good way) in the process.

How to Be Less Present While Texting

Let's face it: texting is one of our primary modes of communication between SOs these days. Learning how to be just a little bit absent while texting will serve you well.

Rule 1: Never be the last one to text.

Trust me on this one. Every time you're in a texting conversation, make sure that he is the last to text. When he texts you, he will be waiting for your response, even if it's just an "ok" or a "goodnight." If your response to his text message isn't necessary, don't send it. It will cause him to wait by his phone wondering if you are going to respond.

Rule 2: Always have a slower text-back tempo than him.

You know the text-back tempo: the speed at which someone replies to a text. The rhythm of the conversation, if you will. Keep an idea of how long it took him to respond to your last text message, and don't text him back quicker than he texts you back. It's a turn off to appear that you have nothing going on. You're just as busy as him (or you want him to think so, anyway). Therefore don't respond to texts immediately. Take your time. As much time as him, to be exact.

Rule 3: Wait and see if he texts first.

Say you two set up a date for Thursday night. It's Wednesday night and you haven't heard from him since Tuesday morning when you sent you that funny work meme. You're just about to pick up the phone to see if you're still on for dinner, but after you entered the message and before you hit "send," you decide to wait a couple of hours. He texts you 45 minutes later.

While you were deliberating about your text message, your guy was at home playing the game too: he's composed a text message and hasn't hit "send." He's waiting to see if you text first.

You say to yourself that the reason you want to text him is because you want to make other plans with your bestie if dinner isn't on. But that's not the real reason. The real reason you're texting is because you want to talk to him and make sure that you still have plans.

There are times when you may need to text. But 99% of the time, why not just wait and see if he texts you first? Make him wonder where you are. Make him miss you. Make him think about how much he wants to be talking to you.

Get a Life (or If You Must, Pretend to)

Next, you need to get a life. It's ok (preferable, even) to decline invitations because you've already made other plans. But if you haven't declined an invitation from your guy in a while, it might be time to just pretend to be busy or make plans with your girlfriends when you know he is going to invite you to do something. Don't be rude or cancel plans at the last minute, but it's ok to cancel plans the day before or to say that something came up. It will be a little reminder to him that you aren't always sitting around waiting to hang out with him.

The Date is Getting Good? Time to Leave.

The date is going well. The sexual tension between you is so thick you could cut it with a knife, the conversation is engaging, and everything about his body language indicates that he is all about you. This is the perfect time to say that you're getting tired, have someplace to be, or some other excuse to end the evening.

Letting your time together fizzle is a great way of making your guy think that you are just another resistable girl. Over time, any date will fizzle no matter how great it was. Even the best movies in the world would suck if they were too long. The best vacation in the universe would lose its luster if it went on for months. The fact that these things have an end point is exactly what makes them so precious.

Don't let your date get to the fizzle point. Even if you could talk all night, resist. Leave after a couple of hours at that particular moment when he feels the most confident that the date is flawless.

This has a few desired effects. First, it will make him miss you more when you're not there. It will also make him remember the date more fondly because there was no point at which he was thinking about grabbing a cab and heading home. Finally, it shifts the power directly to you. You called the shots for a minute, which is sexy.

Be Mysterious

There are often times when you are dating someone with whom you feel quite uninhibited. You feel that you can talk to them about anything. But to begin with at the very least, leave a little mystery. Not only should he be wondering where you are and why you're not texting him, but he should also be wondering about who you are: what's your endgame? What are you about? Where do you come from?

Our minds fill in blank spaces in stories, narratives, and information clusters with information that makes sense and is appealing to us. Leaving gaps in your personal information lets him fill it in imaginatively in his mind. Additionally, a little bit of mystery makes things exciting.

Show Your Passion

A previous boyfriend once told me that he knew he was really into me when we got into a passionate argument on date number 3 about political beliefs. We didn't agree, but showing that I was passionate about something was what made him realize that he couldn't resist me.

Don't worry about coming across as weird on disagreeable. Whatever you're into, whether it's political beliefs, your favorite band, or the Comicon convention, own it proudly. It makes you appear confident, because you don't care what he thinks. But it also allows you to show him what you're like at your best. When you are passionate, your eyes are big, your face lights up, and you smile more. You're happier, and that makes you look sexy.

Use Body Language

Some people might call this being a tease. We prefer to say that we "don't give in completely." If you think about it, using body language to leave him wanting more is just an extension of what we've already discussed with texting, leaving the date early, and declining invitations every once in awhile. Make it a game to find as many ways as possible to use body language to be irresistible. There are plenty of ways to do this, but here are a few to get you started:

Hold hands "obliquely." While holding hands, don't hold too tight, and hold his hand in a way that leaves some space between your palm and his.
Likewise, sit slightly obliquely to him. Don't face him head on with your knees pointing directly at him and your forehead in a position where, if you two were sitting head to head, your foreheads would touch. Put your forehead at an angle to his.
When you kiss, pull away a little bit occasionally to be fun and flirty. It will make him lean into you more since you were previously mid-kiss, putting you in a sexy position of power.
Pull away from a kiss or holding hands before he does.

With a little practice, you can leave him wanting more every time. The key is to have the confidence to pull away while things are still good. Sure, he may have a six pack and lips like George Clooney's, but irresistible girls don't let him know that they even noticed. You're beautiful and sexy, so of course he is into you. Now, use these tips and techniques to ensure that you're running through his mind constantly.

Looking for more? We asked 25 men what they find irresistible in a woman, and this is what they said.

The Complete Guide To Being An Irresistible Woman: 6 Techniques That Will Keep Him Wanting More is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

15 Essential Dating Rules Every Girl Should Stick to in 2015

Posted: 05 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

Single ladies – 2015 is in full flow and it’s time to have the best year of dating yet. Did you fall into any bad dating habits last year? Perhaps you consistently dated the wrong type, or maybe you didn’t date enough?

If you’re looking for some top tips, here are 15 dating rules to stick to in 2015.

1) Remember – if he’s prepared to cheat WITH you, he might not be able to stop himself from cheating ON you
It might seem fun at the time, but being the ‘other woman’ is always risky business. The old saying goes: ‘a leopard never changes its spots’, and as the late James Goldsmith once said: "when you marry your mistress, you create a job vacancy". Don’t be fooled into thinking that finding you meant he found ‘the one’. If he’s cheated on a partner before with no guilty conscience, you’ll never be sure that the same thing might not happen to you in the future.

2) Maintain a bit of mystery
This applies to all aspects of dating – from the way you dress to the topics you discuss over dinner. When we’re anxious on a date, we tend to babble on to hide our nervousness and may give away our secrets too early. If you’re guilty of this, focus on finding out about your date too, ask questions and always leave him wanting to find out more. On the topic of clothing – don’t feel you have to go for the ‘reveal all’ approach to get his attention. A little bit of mystery is far sexier.

3) Be fair – if you want a guy to give you girl time, then let him have guy time too
When we first start dating someone, it’s natural to want to see that person as much as possible, but remember, it’s always better for a relationship to develop slowly and to maintain balance. If a guy wants to go on a stag weekend with the boys, don’t get annoyed at this suggestion because you want him to yourself. Instead, remember the key rule – if you want to have girl time, you have to be fair and let him have his guy time too.

4) Don’t give away how keen you are too soon
There’s nothing that puts a guy off faster than a girl who is clingy and overkeen. Even if you are 100% sure he’s the one and you’ve never felt like this before – don’t give everything away too soon. Guys can take longer than girls for their emotional feelings to develop and the last thing you want to do is to scare him off. So before you start telling him you love him, naming your future children and talking about marriage – just enjoy the moment and getting to know each other.

5) It’s better to know and risk feeling disappointed than to never know and always wonder
Does he like me? Would he date me? Does he still have feelings for me? Us ladies torment ourselves with unanswered questions and what-ifs, but it’s time for a change. If you always wait for a guy to do the initiating, be brave and say what’s on your mind. Let 2015 be the year that you eradicate the what-ifs and find out where you stand. Perhaps a guy doesn’t reciprocate, but who cares, at least you know.

6) Be honest about how you feel – don’t ghost
‘Ghosting’ has become a dating norm these days – if you’re not familiar with the term, it’s when somebody suddenly disappears from a dating situation rather than saying how they truly feel; ignoring text and calls and fading away with no explanation. It’s the cowards way out of dating, but so many of us are doing it because it’s the easy alternative to being brutally honest.
If you’re guilty of ghosting – stop. Imagine what it’s like to be on the receiving end, wondering what you’ve said or done wrong. It may be awkward to say: "I don’t see this going anywhere", but an honest text is better than radio silence.

7) Stop worrying about what other people think about you
We stop ourselves from doing things, saying things or dating certain people because of our worries about what other people think. It’s time to stop putting other people first and do what you want to do. If you find someone attractive – go for it! Don’t worry about what your family and friends say – they aren’t the ones dating him. The same goes for the person you’re dating – be yourself and stop feeling self-conscious about their feelings towards you.

8) To get something you’ve never had before in life, you must be prepared do something you’ve never done
Are you stuck in a dating rut? Do you find yourself going to the same bars every weekend and meeting the same people? It’s time for a change! Never tried a dating site before? Get on one ASAP. Always been reluctant to go to classes at the gym? Go for it – you never know who you might meet there. Do new things, go to new places and you never know what surprises may appear in your life.

9) Don’t be a doormat – you should never give a guy the satisfaction of knowing you’ll always wait for him
We all have that one guy who can’t do anything wrong in our eyes. It’s not a realistic relationship, it’s one we’ve exaggerated in our heads and made him out to be Prince Charming…and he knows it! It’s time to face up to reality and stop being a doormat. He’s just using you because he knows you’ll always be there. Stand up for yourself and know that if a guy thinks you’re too available, he’ll take you for granted.

10) Always listen to your heart
Not sure whether a guy is right for you? Confused about the advice your friends are giving you? Perhaps the most important lesson of all is to always listen to your heart and that gut feeling of yours. Do you think about him all the time and long to hear his voice? If it feels right, go for it. Let your heart lead you to happiness.

11) Never make a guy the centre of your world
If your blossoming relationship becomes your obsession and you forget about your friends and family, you might be left completely alone if things crumble. It’s easy to get absorbed into a bubble when things are going well, but remember that boyfriends come and go, but your friends and family will always be there, so don’t ignore them.

12) Stay optimistic – just because something’s not happening right now, it doesn’t mean it never will
Feel miffed that the guy you liked has suddenly got a new girlfriend? Don’t feel crushed about it. Not every relationship lasts a lifetime and realise that just because it’s not happening now, it doesn’t mean it never will in the future. Keep your optimistic attitude in life and don’t cancel things out too early.

13) Remember that beauty might capture a person’s attention but it’s personality that will capture their heart
Yes – being attracted to someone is important and with a plethora of dating apps and sites, sometimes we rely on physical appearance initially – but we need to move past this. Are you blinded by a guy’s good looks and is this hiding flaws in his personality? Would you rather go out with a handsome guy and be bored, or go out with an average looking guy with a fabulous sense of humour? I rest my case. The same goes for the qualities a guy looks for in you. Focus on letting your personality shine and being yourself rather than worrying too much about how you look.

14) Don’t judge someone before you’ve actually met them – give them a chance
We’ve all done it. It’s easy to label a guy a ‘player’ just because of the photos he has on his profile or assume he’s just after a fling, but how do you know until you’ve met up? Make it an important rule this year to stop judging guys before you’ve actually met up. Give guys you wouldn’t usually date a chance – they might just surprise you.

15) Don’t chase guys
In the words of Giancomo Casanova: "Be the flame, not the moth." A woman should never chase a man. Full stop. Are you bombarding him with texts? Have you asked him why he hasn’t been in touch? Are you too full on? Sometimes we chase without even realising it. If he’s into you – he’ll be the one doing the chasing. Smothering him will only drive him away, so lure him in instead of chasing him away.

So there you have it ladies – some nuggets of wisdom to remember in 2015. Love life, feel inspired and see dating as a gateway to happiness rather than a hurdle that hinders you. The right guy is out there for you, so follow these rules and you just might find him…

Wondering what people chose as their new year’s love resolutions? Check out these 25 revelations…

15 Essential Dating Rules Every Girl Should Stick to in 2015 is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

5 Child Friendly Valentine’s Day Date Ideas

Posted: 04 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

Ahh, February 14th, Valentines day. The one day a year it's perfectly okay to be outwardly mushy and romantic. All my friends who are in happy couples are usually making plans from the middle of January, nights away, fancy restaurants, breakfast in bed.. It really is a day to celebrate your love. As a single mother, I don't quite have any of those plans on the agenda, instead I usually celebrate the day with my daughter. But hopefully, soon, there will come a time when I quite possibly will be dating on Valentine’s Day, and I won’t just want to leave my daughter at home, instead I will be looking to celebrate with both!

With this in mind, here are some child friendly Valentine's Day Date ideas perfect for single parents. Not only are these great for single parents who are new on the dating scene, but for families too who wish to include their children in doing something to celebrate the day.

Five child friendly Valentine’s Day date ideas.

1. Take a boat trip.
There is nothing more romantic than sailing along a river with your love, I know right now you're picturing a little row boat (which is hardly safe or enjoyable for a child) but so many cities offer sight seeing boat trips which are a lot more enjoyable for the whole family. Find out if your local city offers them, I can guarantee if you live there you've probably never given them a try and you never know, you might find out something interesting about the city you live in.

2. Go to the cinema.
I know stereotypically this is a romantic date for two, but there is so much choice in films out that who says you have to go see the latest chick flick? Why not opt for the current family movie and go during the day? Not only will it be cheaper, it'll be quieter and practically all family movies have some form of romance into woven into them. I bet you and your date will still find a moment or two to lace fingers and there may even still be some tears. I for one practically always need a shoulder to cry on during a family movie.

3. Eat out at a family friendly restaurant.
Candle lit dinner for two out of the question? Why not all go out to a family friendly restaurant? I don't mean a fast food restaurant, I mean one that offers a children's menu and colouring sheets. Children do often enjoy eating out as a treat so as long as you're prepared with something to keep them entertained while they wait for their food (an iPad works wonders!) you'll still be able to both avoid cooking and order one dessert with two spoons.

4. Bowling.
I always feel like bowling is one of those forgotten ideas for a date, like going out dancing (which isn't exactly child friendly). Bowling is something you, your date and your children can have fun with. The environment is always relaxed so no pressure to get romantic in front of the little ones but there is always a chance for asking him to help you on your turn, you know the old him placing his arms around to show you how to get a good swing? This also works well with mini golf.

5. An outdoor (or indoor) picnic.
The middle of February is rather cold where I'm from which is why I've gone with an indoor or an outdoor picnic. If you're lucky enough to live somewhere that doesn't consider blizzards as normal Valentine's weather then pack up a picnic and head to the park. This might be one of the few activities where you will be lucky enough to get some time alone with your date while the kids are away running off some energy. You can cuddle up on the picnic rug and keep an eye on them. If it's too cold for that, why not have an indoor picnic. My favourite kind is the one where you order in pizza and set up camp on the sitting room floor. You could all watch a movie or even play some fun board games, I always think these are great for getting to know a date, especially ones which require answering questions.

Just because you're a single parent and getting a babysitter is out of the question does not mean you have to give Valentine's Day a miss. There are so many activities and date ideas you can do that could quite easily involve your children, I've simply selected my favourite to share with you above. You can make even the most simple date night ideas extra special, and remember that it’s all about the company you keep-surrounded by your child and a person you’re romantically interested in? You’re guaranteed to have a great night!

5 Child Friendly Valentine’s Day Date Ideas is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

Fifty Shades of Grey: Fantasy or Fallacy?

Posted: 03 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ has sold more than a 100 million copies worldwide and with the movie version just about to steam up theaters everywhere come Feb 13th, we decided to take a closer look at what a relationship like the one between Christian and Anastasia would look like in real life. You know, our real, boring, non-BDSM lives?

Obviously, the main reason that ‘Fifty Shades’ skyrocketed to such epic popularity is the fantasy element of it all. However, with just about every female reader day-dreaming about what it would be like to have her own personal Christian Grey, we wanted to know if Anastasia really had something worth envying. And if so? What are the chances that a regular girl in this day and age could meet her very own Mr. Grey?

Well, slim to absolutely none, to put it mildly. As you’ll see in our infographic below, unless you’re into female Chinese handbag designers, there aren’t any self-made billionaires under the age of 30 in the world. However, when it comes to dominant-submissive sexual relationships, you’re in luck, as those are much easier to come by. Check out our infographic below for the lowdown on real BDSM relationships versus the ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ version. Is it still worth fantasizing about?

You be the judge!

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Fifty Shades of Grey: Fantasy or Fallacy? is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

What Should You Do If Your Partner Cheats?

Posted: 02 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

If you are in a committed, monogamous relationship, it's a lingering thought and fear: "What if my partner cheats?" If you've ever been cheated on, you have experienced the pain, betrayal, and heartbreak that comes with it. To be in a relationship is to be extremely vulnerable: to open yourself up to someone completely and risk the chance that they could hurt you in many ways, but cheating is widely considered to be among the worst.

So what should you do if your partner cheats on you? Should you end the relationship immediately? Is once a cheater really always a cheater? Let's talk about cheating and how you can approach it if it happens to you.

Cheating is as old as love. As long as people have been falling in love, people have been cheating on their significant others. Studies estimate that approximately 70% of spouses cheat. That means that if you're married, chances are that you will cheat on your partner, be cheated on, or both.

This probably comes as a surprise to most. If so many people cheat, why don't we hear more about it? Why hasn't it happened to us yet? The reason why you don't hear about it more is because it's sensitive, often humiliating, and very personal. Chances are that you or someone you know has been cheated on. Maybe the infidelity didn't end the relationship and no one was the wiser. Additionally, some people never get caught at all.

Is Once a Cheater Really Always a Cheater?

That's what they say, but is it actually true?

One study says yes.

Scientists at the University of Southern Alabama asked 443 men and women about their level of satisfaction in their relationships based on whether or not they or their partner were "poached," or approached by their current partner while they were dating a previous partner. The study showed that relationships that started with a partner being poached from a previous partner were at greater risk of unhappiness and breakups.

From the study:

"Individuals who were poached by their current romantic partners were less committed, less satisfied, and less invested in their relationships. They also paid more attention to romantic alternatives, perceived alternatives to be of higher quality, and engaged in higher rates of infidelity compared to non-poached participants."

The study specifically refers to people who were dating someone when they were approached by their new partner. But what about a partner who hasn't been in that situation, but has cheated in the past? Can they be trusted not to cheat again? Studies say no.

Graduate researcher Kayla Knopp from the University of Denver found that people who cheat on their partner are approximately three and a half times more likely to do it again in their future relationships.

It's easy to tell yourself that you are different: that the girl before you was a shrewd bitch and that's the reason why he cheated on her. He would never do that again. While studies can't actually tell you what your partner might do in the future, you are treading on dangerous ground when you date someone who has a history of cheating, especially if they've been known to do it more than once.

What Should I Do If My Partner Cheats?

If your partner has cheated on you, there's one thing you can be sure about: you are not alone. Many people have been in your shoes, experienced the pain, and wrestled with what to do next. Your choice will likely be swayed by your circumstance: it's easy to tell someone to dump a cheater immediately without giving them another chance. But what if you're married? What if you live together? What if you have children?

The first thing you need to do is have a frank conversation about what happened. No, you don't need to talk about every detail of the incident, or any of the details for that matter. But the following questions may influence your decision. Find out the answer from your partner:

Was it a one-time occurrence or has this been going on for a long time?
What is unsatisfying about your current relationship that you felt the need to cheat?
Are you even interested in repairing this relationship?
What steps do you intend to take to ensure that this doesn't happen again?
Do you believe you are capable of being in a committed, monogamous relationship, or do you feel that it's not for you?

Repairing a relationship after one partner was unfaithful is often a long, hard process. It requires that both partners are completely committed to making it work. That's why it's so important to get to the bottom of your partner's dissatisfaction with their relationship. Statistics show that your cheating partner will likely cheat again, and they are even more likely if the factors that caused them to look for alternatives are still there. Slapping a cheater on the hand without acknowledging the cause is treating the symptom, not the problem.

I'm not at all saying that your partner cheated because of you or something about your relationship. Relationships are hard. Just because things aren't perfect doesn't mean that it's okay to cheat. Often, it's easier for people to believe that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. What's actually happening is that a long-term committed relationship is more challenging to maintain than a strictly sexual relationship or even a newer relationship. This is especially true when there is a lot at risk with the long-term relationship, such as a family, a marriage, a home, or even a social network that you two have built together.

Some relationships are not repairable. Some signs that yours is one of these might be that:

Your partner feels that he or she is incapable of being in a committed monogamous relationship. Even if you believe that's not true, the fact that they believe that is fertile grounds for repeat infidelity.
Your partner blames you or other circumstances for the infidelity and does not accept responsibility. If this is your partner, get out now. Cheating is not your fault. While the infidelity might be due to other factors, your partner should still be taking full responsibility for his or her actions.
Your partner blames the person with whom they cheated. Neither you nor your partner should be blaming the third party, or the "other woman" (or "other man"). Sure, they were in the wrong, but they aren't in this relationship. They aren't the one who made a commitment to you. It's best to leave them out of the conversation.

Don't be fooled by the common belief that if only you could get your partner away from the person they cheated on you with, they will not cheat. For example, there's no need to make your partner take another job, away from the accomplice. Temptation is everywhere. Your partner's problem isn't a weakness for one person. It's a lack of respect for the bounds of your relationship.

Whether you choose to continue your relationship or call it quits is up to you. Anecdotally, I have met people who went on to have successful relationships after one partner was unfaithful. But remember this: relationships are built on trust. If you feel that you will never again be able to trust your partner when he or she leaves the house, then it is time to find a new partner. You can't go on in your relationship constantly looking at your partner's text messages, reading his or her email, or questioning him or her when they tell you they're out with friends. If you can't forgive and forget, no one blames you. But it's best that your relationship ends and you find a partner whom you don't have to question because they haven't proved themselves unfaithful.

What If Your Partner Just Isn't Meant to Be Monogamous?

In recent years, the new idea has emerged that perhaps some people are not capable of a monogamous lifestyle. In the past, people who chronically struggled with monogamy were destined to be in relationships in which they were either breaking the heart of their partner, or forever single with no committed relationship. But just because you aren't able to be committed to one partner 'til death do you part doesn't mean that you aren't interested in the security, intimacy, and other rewards of being in a relationship. Sure, lots of people think that you don't deserve those benefits of being in a relationship if you can't stay monogamous. But over the last several years, a movement has arisen that gives those people a second chance– by being with people who are either just like them, or who don't mind sharing their partner in order to keep them.

This doesn't mean that it's okay to cheat. Couples who have committed to an open relationship are in constant communication with one another and follow the terms of their agreement. That doesn't mean going behind a partner's back and cheating. An open relationship only works if both partners are okay with the agreement.

If you are with a person whose track record indicates that they may not be capable of a committed relationship, it may be time to talk to your partner about opening up your relationship to other sexual partners. This may be a last resort for keeping your relationship together, especially in certain circumstances, such as if you have children. While it might not be ideal, you and your partner might decide that it is preferable to ending your relationship forever in some situations.

If you know that this arrangement is one that you can't handle emotionally, there's nothing wrong with that. These probably were not the original terms of the deal that you made when you committed to one another. Only you and your partner can decide. Whatever you choose together, the most important thing is open, honest, and clear communication so that both partners can have their needs met. If both partners cannot feel secure in the arrangement, then you will have no choice but to part ways.

Betrayal by a partner is devastating. With time, the pain will lessen. However you and your partner choose to proceed, make sure that it is something that will make you happy. You didn't choose for this to happen to you and it is not your fault. Seek the support of friends and family during this time. You can get through this and whatever happens, a happier relationship is on the other side.

What Should You Do If Your Partner Cheats? is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

Valentine’s Day Survival Guide For a Single Girl

Posted: 01 Feb 2015 05:00 PM PST

Here we go again: Valentine’s Day is on the horizon, you’re a single girl, and maybe you’re feeling a little lonely about that. Maybe you don’t have a Valentine this year. Maybe you didn’t have one last year either, and maybe you’re wondering what the hell you’re going to do this year. I’ve been there, and I feel you.

Valentine’s Day is one of those weird holidays that seem to solely exist just to make single people feel bad. It can be hard if you’re single, especially when well-meaning but misguided people ask what your Valentine’s Day plans are. That’s the worst. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

If you’re a single girl, you can still have fun on V-Day. Here’s your Valentine’s Day survival guide.

Step one: don’t panic.

It’s totally okay that you’re single on February 14. It’s just a day. A day that happens to be known as Valentine’s Day. Some people observe this day and some don’t. There are even couples who don’t celebrate it. So it’s okay if you don’t have someone to celebrate it with. Just think of it as any other day, and you’ll be fine. Take a deep, calming, cleansing breath. Then, find something to do. Which brings us to step two…

Step two: distract yourself.

It’s also totally okay if you can’t get past the idea that you’re single on Valentine’s Day. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Instead, distract yourself. Here are some things you can do:

1. Have a Netflix marathon.

Or if you don’t have Netflix, bust out those DVDs like it’s 2007! Just immerse yourself in someone else’s world for a few hours. Go through your queue and just attack it. Avoid those romcoms (only if you think they’ll bum you out) and opt for something a little different. Maybe have a horror film marathon. House of the Devil is a good one. Or finally catch up on Orange Is the New Black or House of Cards. Or visit some Friends. The key is that you’re relaxed and having a great time!

2. Throw a party.

You can throw a singles-only party, or if you’re feeling charitable, you can invite your coupled friends who loathe the day as much as you do. It can be nice to surround yourself with others on Valentine’s Day. And don’t feel like you have to serve candy hearts and chocolate — break out whatever kind of food and drink you want to! Maybe even make your party a wine tasting. That could be fun!

3. Go out with your single gal pals.

Get a group of your single girl (or guy!) friends, and get the hell out of the house. Go see a movie, or go hit the bars. Do whatever makes you guys feel happy. You don’t even need a big group — even just one trusted friend is plenty! Remember, the whole idea is to distract yourself. You know what a super fun group activity is? Roller skating. Get thee to a roller rink. I promise.

4. Pamper yourself.

Fill up a bathtub with bubbles and/or bath salts, light some candles, grab your O magazine, and slink into that hot water. Then, blow dry your hair and do your nails. Make a whole evening out of pampering yourself. Make yourself your Valentine’s Day date. Treat yourself well. Cook yourself a scrumptious dinner. Be kind to yourself.

5. Call your mom.

Or any mother-like figure in your life, like a sweet grandmother or wickedly cool aunt. And just unload. Your mom has to listen to you, because she loves you and she’s, well, your mom. It’s like free therapy. So take this moment to catch up with your best lady guide in your life and just shoot the breeze.

6. Go ahead, have that drink.

Or two. Or three. Just be responsible and don’t drive anywhere. But if there ever was a night for a few glasses of wine, it’s this night right here. Buy a bottle of champagne just for you. Toast and celebrate yourself!

7. Get started on a new hobby.

The best way to distract yourself is to get started on a new hobby. Really immerse yourself in it. Bust out those Pinterest boards and pick something to DIY. It’s all about keeping your brain busy. And who knows, you may end up with a nice scarf.

8. Ask someone out that you’ve met online!

Apparently February 14 is actually a really busy day online. Maybe hop onto WeLoveDates and find that person who is just as bored and plan-less as you are — and unite! Sure, you run the risk of going on a terrible Valentine’s date, but maybe you’ll get a great story out of it. Or maybe you’ll find someone awesome! Which also makes a great story. You never know until you try. So if you truly can’t bear the idea of not having a date on Valentine’s Day, sign up, make your profile, and get clicking.

9. Write Valentines or gratitude notes to everyone that’s close to you.

Who says a Valentine has to be the love of your life? Maybe your Valentine is your best gal pal or gay BFF. Let them know how much you appreciate them by writing them a heartfelt letter. Acknowledging all the love you already have in your life will make you feel better.

10. Treat yourself.

You’ve already pampered yourself, so why not treat yourself to that handbag you’ve been eyeing, or adding a little Beatles love to your record collection? Girl, do some online shopping! Buy yourself a Valentine’s Day gift. It’s not sad, its awesome, because you know exactly what you want, so there will be no need to worry about exchanging it or what will happen if you don’t like it, as you’re the one picking it out. No stress!

These are just some of the things you can do instead of wallowing alone. Don’t let yourself wallow!

Step three: stay off social media entirely.

If you’re one of those people who gets jealous easily, Valentine’s Day is the day for you to stay off Facebook. There’s going to be lots of photos of flowers and gifts and romantic outings. Lots of declarations of love. It could be difficult to see. It doesn’t mean that you’re not happy for your friends, it just means that sometimes, when you’re single, being bombarded by all the Valentine’s Day hype can be a big pill to swallow. So turn off Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for the night. Well, maybe not Twitter — that’s likely to be filled with funny snarky tweets. But definitely Facebook and Instagram. Trust me on this one.

Step four: learn to love yourself.

You’ve probably heard it before: how is anyone ever going to love you if you can’t love yourself? Learning to love yourself can be a difficult process, but it’s well worth it. You won’t be ready to embark on a relationship if you seriously hate yourself. You’re dooming your own relationship if you walk into it with a terrible attitude about yourself.

But it’s like I always say, if you can’t learn to love yourself, at least learn how to accept yourself. Start with accenptance and build towards love. Push all that noise inside your own head about how you’re not good enough — put it right out — and focus on the parts of yourself that you love. Everybody’s got something. It can be superficial (like you love your hair) or it can be even deeper (you love your very soul); as long as you find at least one thing. Make a list, and read that list whenever you’re feeling down about yourself. It will help.

Tell yourself, out loud, how awesome you are. Yes, you may feel silly doing it, but go ahead and do it, because hearing it out loud can make all the difference. Tell yourself that it’s perfectly okay that you’re single, because being single has no bearing on how awesome you are. Repeat after me: you can be single and still be awesome. It’s true. Don’t let one day full of Hallmark-y propaganda change how you feel about yourself. Your awesomeness knows no bounds!

Pass this guide on to anyone who needs it. It’s hard enough to be a single girl, let alone on Valentine’s Day, so spread good vibes and good cheer. And remember: it’s just one day out of many. Valentine’s Day is what you make of it. You can go out with friends or you can do absolutely nothing — both are fine options — but no wallowing allowed. If you’re going to wallow, set your timer for 5 minutes and then be done with it. Please don’t spend the whole night in a vortex of self pity. Not. Worth. It! It’s better to have fun instead.

What are you planning to do on Valentine’s Day? What are some ideas you can think of for all the single ladies (all the single ladies)? Now put your hands up!

Image via We Heart It.

Valentine’s Day Survival Guide For a Single Girl is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

13 Signs That You’ve Found “The One”

Posted: 29 Jan 2015 05:00 PM PST

Now that Friends is on Netflix, I’ve been marathoning it like it’s my damn job. And I’ve gone through all the big relationships — Ross and Rachel! Chandler and Monica! Paul Rudd and Phoebe! — and even though it’s just a TV show, I can’t help but think about the big relationship stuff. For example, the biggest relationship question of all: how do you know when you’ve found “the one”?

There are many ways to tell if you’ve found “the one”, both big and small. Here are some of them. Please note that every couple is different and no relationship is the same. Think of these as ideas to get the ball rolling in your head, if you’re truly unsure about if your partner is the one for you.

1. You feel you can be your true self around them.

For example, you have no shame about your Friends Netflix marathons. You can whip out your geekiest, nerdiest stuff without being worried about their reaction. You can be who you really are. You have no fear. You know that no matter what, they’ll still love and respect you. Ladies, you don’t feel like you have to wake up and hour and a half before they do just to put on makeup and make yourself all glam, because to quote Katy Perry, they think you’re pretty without any makeup on. It’s all about being your true self and having them embrace that.

2. You miss them when they’re gone.

Even if you saw them the day before. Even if you actually live together, and they’re out for the night, there’s still a part of you that misses them, even though you know it’s silly. Because you want to be with them, and not in an unhealthy obsessive way — in a normal, “Gosh I wonder what they’re up to” way. It’s good to miss people. It means you want more of them, because there’s something good in there to miss.

3. They know just how to cheer you up.

When you’re having a rough day, they can not only identify that immediately, but also know exactly how to cheer you up, because they know you so well. They know what techniques will work for lifting your spirits and what won’t. If you’re the kind of person who prefers to stew alone, that’s something they know by now, and they give you your space. If you’re the kind of person who craves comfort and silliness, they know that too, and they deliver like Dominos.

4. You know how to fight.

Finding “The One” doesn’t mean an end to all fighting, forever. Every couple fights. What’s important is how you fight. You know how to fight fair. You know how to fight with an end goal in mind, not just for the sake of fighting, because you’ve learned how to work out your issues together. The result is that you leave the fight with something valuable — an understanding.

5. Your life goals are aligned.

You both know what you want in life, and they’re similar. The big stuff, like whether or not you’re having kids, is something that you both know and agree on. You maybe have similar career paths, or a similar timeline of when you want to achieve certain goals and hit certain milestones. It’s not like you have to have identical paths — that would be boring — it’s more like you have identical energies in reaching your goals.

6. You can’t imagine your future without them.

Not to get all dramatic about it, but when you picture your future, they’re right smack dab in the middle of it, because you couldn’t possibly imagine your future without them. Sometimes when you’re dating someone and you think about your future, they’re not really in the center of it. They might be an afterthought, a sort of, “yeah, I guess if they’re in it, that would be cool.” But if they’re “the one” for you, then there’s no doubt that not only are they in your future, but they’re a big part of it.

7. You know to communicate.

Just like knowing how to fight, knowing how to communicate is important. You know how to vocalize your needs to your partner, and vice versa, and you’re not afraid to do so. Huffington Post cited Dr. Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist, who noted, of “The One”, “They stay close when you confide, give you their full attention and move in to answer to your needs, touching your hand when you are a little unsure, beaming and hugging you when you are glad, and tenderly comforting you when you are in pain.” They pick up on your signals, both verbal and non-verbal, and know what to do with them.

8. Your relationship is a comfortable one.

You generally feel relaxed, at ease, and happy with your partner — and this is what a comfortable relationship is. You’re not anxious or worried about where you guys are, or where you’re going to be — you’re just happy as is. You can spend the evening watching TV or you could go out and have a great adventure — either one is fine, as long as you’re together. You’re just chill. You’re not paranoid that they’re going to break up with you or cheat on you. You know you’re good.

9. Their wins are your wins.

When your partner has an amazing opportunity or breakthrough, you’re not jealous of them — you’re ecstatic, because their wins are also your wins, because you’re a team. There’s no jealousy in between you two. Your each other’s cheerleader, always rooting for one another, and thrilled when something amazing happens.

10. They just “get” you.

When I say, “they just ‘get’ you”, what I mean is that, your partner knows who you are and totally digs it. Something between you just clicked. You probably have lots of weird inside jokes in between you two that are hilarious and only make sense to you guys (and aren’t those the best?). They know what makes you tick, what makes you happy, what makes you sad, and they’re into it. And it goes both ways — you “get” them, too.

11. You would do anything to make them happy.

Not only would you do everything in your power to make them happy, but you’re totally willing to put their happiness before your own. If you have to be totally silly or ridiculous, you’d do it, if it brings a smile to their face. You would do whatever it takes, because their happiness is important to you.

12. You know how to compromise.

It could be as simple as letting them have their movie pick on Netflix night (sorry, Friends) or as big as deciding where to live, but you know how to compromise, and you’re happy to do it. That’s what happy couples do, they compromise for each other. There’s all sorts of things that are gonna be thrown at you in your relationship, and if you can’t work it out and compromise, you’re going to be in for a real rough time.

13. You’ve found a new best friend.

This isn’t to say that they replace your previous best friend — you can have more than one best friend, and they’re one of them. You’ve found someone that you can rely on when you’re totally screwed, someone to just chill with, someone to go on fabulous adventures with and also, someone to be your date to that wedding. They’re more than just a boyfriend or girlfriend to you. There’s a friendship there as well, a solid friendship that you can build on. It’s important in a relationship to have that friendship, to have someone you can talk to openly and honestly when you need to. When you’ve found that person, go for it.

What are some signs you can think of that show you’ve found “The One”?

Image via WeHeartIt.

13 Signs That You’ve Found “The One” is a post from the: WeLoveDates blog

Online Dating Insider

Sunday, February 15, 2015